As a general rule, teenage girls don’t quite understand teenage boys. In turn, teenage boys have a difficult time interpreting the ways of teenage girls. All the confusion intensifies on Feb. 14, when the two are expected to mix in a flurry of romantic gestures and declarations of passion. Most sweethearts choose to show their affection by giving gifts, perhaps a box of chocolates or lovely flowers. On the other hand, some choose to express their adoration with gargantuan teddy bears and other stuffed animals.

These giant toys are impractical, expensive, a little scary, and downright unappealing for both the ladies and the gents.

The most obvious problem with giant stuffed things is their lack of practicality. It must cost a heap for factories to create so much fluff to put inside a creepy bear, and the high price is paid out of the pockets of poor boys trying to satisfy their darlings. Granted, dollars per cubic foot of material is probably pretty low. However, for a useless, space-taking, tacky thing, the point is moot.

By definition, “giant” means larger than usual. Bestowing a giant stuffed animal to your loved one gives them the responsibility of finding a larger-than-usual space to put it. This is generally difficult, considering most closets and cabinets are reserved for necessary possessions.

Giant teddy bears are hardly romantic and never classy. We’ve all graduated kindergarten and it’s time we show it. Gentlemen, the ladies generally appreciate tasteful and sophisticated things. Ladies, show the gentlemen how “for real” you are and buy him some cologne!

The teenagers that purchase oversized stuffed animals are simply naïve. They want to convey that they care a lot for their beloveds. Maybe they think Valentine’s Day is a time to be a little impractical. After all, isn’t love blind? Doesn’t love make people do crazy things they wouldn’t normally do? The best way to show your devotion is to get them something personal – something that’s their favorite or that they can relate to. If you insist on getting something huge, they probably won’t be disappointed with an abundance of chocolate.